Things you can apply for on craigslist:

Part 1 of what I’m sure will be a multi-part series in the style of  The Increasingly Misnamed Hitchhiker’s Trilogy.

Backstage at the Magic Show (Santa Monica) – for $35/show, you can learn how to do the lighting for a magic show.
(totally applied for that, yes.)
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Shot Girl – be one of the girl that walks around a nightclub & sells the little shots in test tubes. Estimated $300 – $600 a weekend.
(Hell yes I applied for that, even if I will have to wear a short skirt & a corset.)
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Live-in Personal Assistant/Dog Care – go to someone’s house in Malibu & fill in for their assistant for 5 weeks, helping to take care of their 3 seven month old lab puppies. $200/week & you can do… whatever else it is you do.
(Take care of puppies for five weeks & get paid? Apply!)

Things I did not apply for:
Need Graphic Artist for Web Background Image (Open)
I am putting up a website that shows what it will be like in Hell. I need a graphic artist who can make a visual depiction of what life will be like in a den of fire and punishment.
Send website of existing work if possible.

(No, I’m serious, that’s the actual text.)

Music: Flower – Moby